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Wednesday, September 28, 2011

One last lullaby

My heart is running on empty this afternoon. I can barely think, let alone function. My father’s death clock is ticking so loudly it’s pretty much unbearable. Just about an hour ago I was conferenced in on a call with doctors, nurses, Hospice and my aunt/uncle and was informed there is nothing else they can do for my father.

I can’t breathe. I just can’t breathe. My head is spinning in too many circles and I feel faint.

I was told that things with my father have significantly declined in the last 24 hours. The oxygen he was put on yesterday is not helping at all. As of today, he can no longer move and is unable to speak at all - only facial expressions to tell them what he needs.

In less than an hour, I will call his room where Hospice will place the phone to my father’s ear and although he won’t be able to respond, I’ll express my love and sing softly to him one - last - time…

17 comments:

  1. Oh, I am so, so sorry. Losing a loved one is so difficult and sad...and especially a parent. I haven't been keeping up with your blog enough to know more, but when I saw this particular post title, I stopped to read it, and I'm glad I did. I send my blissful thoughts.

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  2. oh my heart aches for you - get some rest - HUGS!

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  3. I am so so sorry. This is so hard. Email me if you want to talk. (((((Hugs)))))

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  4. Hi Sophia,.....there really are no words to make any of this easier for you....I hope you find some solace in the fact that you and your family are in our thoughts and prayers....

    Hugs

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  5. I'm so sorry for what you're going through, Sophia. I know how hard it is to lose a parent. May you find strength in the good memories you have, and in the comfort and love of family and friends. I'm thinking about you.

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  6. Oh Sophia, I am so, so sorry. Words fail me. My heart goes out to you. I'm sending a HUGE virtual hug your way. Stay strong. Xo

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  7. Sophia, all I want to do right now is giving you hugs, hugs, and hugs..

    You're in such a difficult time with so much pain to bear!

    Don't worry about visiting me..I've kept you in my thought since I read the news about your dad. Just take care of yourself!

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  8. still sending thoughtsd, przyers and hugs my dear friend

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  9. Oh Sophia, I don't know what to say. Just want you to know that I am listening and I care.

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  10. I am thinking about you, Sophia, and continuing to pray that you have the strength that you need at this time. May God bless your Father, you and your family. Big hugs to you : )

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  11. In your corner, here for you. It is so hard. Much love to you

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  12. I am so sorry, there really are no other words.
    Just know that your father will pass when he is ready, and he will be at peace. And know that your words will give him much comfort.
    hugs and prayers
    betty

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  13. There are no words at times such as this so just know that love, prayers and thoughts are with you.

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  14. i've been here. don't know what to say. strength.

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  15. My prayers are with you. Strength to you in the coming weeks.

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  16. One does not know what to say in these situations- I've been there with my late brother... and it's hell- but some way there is something within telling us he'll be ok and this wil also will pass- and we'll meet again in heaven

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  17. Not that's it's of any consolation at the moment but many of us know how you're feeling because we have been there. The only thing I can add to my previous comment is that you will survive this because you will be given a strength that you didn't think was possible. More prayers and love.

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